You're pregnant, now what?

Alright, I never went to college so I don't have a degree in anything, but in life you learn a lot from experiences.  It just so happens that I have been pregnant 3 times now so I might know a little bit about pregnancy.  I don't know it all but I will share what I do know from my experiences. Hopefully this will help someone who might need a few answers.  So heres a few little things that will happen now that you are pregnant. WARNING this will be long.

You will almost faint when you see the positive sign..Trying or not.
You may get morning sickness and it may last all day.  This has been the hardest pregnancy for me with sickness.  I fortunately do not throw up but others do.
You may be constipated, like really.
You will have to pee every five minutes.
You will be a starving beast.
You may have cravings and sometimes these craving are the only things that wont make you puke.
You may want to kill your significant other.
You may cry watching commercials.  Even if it isnt sad, you may feel the water works starting up.
You will be gassy, yeah I dont know why but its not fun.
You may feel like a whale or you may feel beautiful.
You may want to brawl with a complete stranger for that stink face you're sure they just gave you.
You will google EVERYTHING.
You will worry so much about this tiny little life growing inside that you will probably cry again.
You will count down the weeks and days like a crazy lady.
You may want A LOT of sex or you may want none.
You boobs will probably be tender. If youre planning on breastfeeding, get used to it.
You will get advice from everyone you meet. Even if its unwanted.
Strangers may try to touch your stomach or guess the gender.  If they say they think its a girl they are just being rude.  (the myth of how you carry boys all in belly, girls all over)
You will want to join a mommy group online.  I absolutely love the girls I have met on mine. You will need some mommy friends to vent and talk to.
You may not have the easiest pregnancy and problems could arise. Dont over think things!
You will be so tired that even watching tv takes too much energy. This doubles if you already have children.
You will probably get stretch marks unless youre one of those lucky bitches.
You will always think you are going into labor towards the end.
You and your significant other may argue over baby names.
You will feel dumb at a lamaze class.
You will go to the doctors so much that a chair in the waiting room has your ass indent in it.
You will wonder if you will poop during delivery.
Yeah, you probably will.
You may say (like I did) "I'm not getting the epidural"
You may not get the epidural but you just might. I did.
You may have heard that contractions feel like period cramps. No.
You may have a very easy fast delivery.
You may not.
You may tear or get an episiotomy. You may not.
Pregnancy and delivery are really just a big surprise and you never know what to expect or whats going to happen but those are some things you may experience. Here are a few things I know for sure,
Your life will change completely.
Your brain will change, this new baby is now priority number one and only (unless you have other children). You will have to make huge decisions for your child.
You will want to give your child the very best and you may never feel good enough.
Your whole life will boil down to that moment when you first see your child,  I can tell you that this is a feeling of pure euphoria its kind of indescribable.  You will look into their eyes and know that you would die in an instant for this tiny warm swollen human. I can also tell you that you are all they want and need.  They want you to love and care for them, they NEED it.
You are all they have so if you didn't have time to shower and look a hot mess, your baby couldn't be happier to have a smelly sweaty mommy or daddy to curl up on.
I hope that all parents take their job very seriously and give their child all the love and care they need. If you do give it your all, I can promise you that even with mistakes you are your child's world. Their very own superhero that they will love forever.  I can tell you that everything you have ever went through is worth it for your child.  When you get the first "I love you" you will feel your heart almost burst.  They seem to keep that effect.
So before this post gets way too long I will end it. Sorry for run on sentences and misplaced commas.
But congratulations and welcome to the club if you are expecting or planning on it someday. I wish you all the very best.

Is this thing on?

Where to start? Alright so I'm sitting here tonight very tired watching Diners, Drive Ins and Dives.  I also happen to be 13 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child.  Just had a big mac that I already regret.  I just made this blog which was kind of a pain in the ass because of my lovely internet connection.  Hopefully as time goes on I'll really know what the hell I'm doing.  I just did a double take at the clock thinking it was close to midnight when its only 9:47 pm, I wont make it much longer.  That is one of the things I kind of knew was going to happen being pregnant again but was hoping my body would find some extra energy I must have stored away sometime in my life, but no luck. This pregnancy has been the hardest feelings wise but the easiest health wise.  My first child is a boy who will be 3 in about a month and a half. My second child is a girl who just turned one a month ago. This baby will be a surprise until the day I push him/her out.  Which at this rate seems like another 20 months.  My son was a surprise (even if my husband tells you otherwise) and my daughter and this baby were planned and by planned I mean completely crazy trying to get pregnant lady.  I'm not proud of the maniac I become but am very proud of the results.  I hope to have a healthy, uneventful rest of my pregnancy and labor and then hopefully just one more little one to complete the family.  Yes, I do realize I may be nuts. I will need to blog earlier in the night because by this time all my brain has energy for is food.  Alright so Im gonna get off this extremely hot lap top now before it explodes. G'night.